I could be your cup of honey sweetened tea,
Soothing your soul with every sip, I could be your cup of whiskey, Awakening your inner beast as you become inebriated off of my words as they pour from my lips... My elixir is quite the mixture, Served with wit, sass, and flirtations, But baby, you won't regret partaking in my libation, Come drink from the fountain of temptation. *note: this is a work in progress...I have more to add :). -Black Honeycomb
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For those of us who are selective in the type of people and energies we let in, it can get quite lonely. If you add life, work, and other responsibilities on top of that, it can also seem to be downright impossible to find people that you genuinely click with--IF you allow those things to stop you from creating meaningful bonds. You see, making friends in the adult realm really comes down to who you meet along your chosen path whether that be higher education, the military, navigating through the job market, or whom you may share similar interests or hobbies with. All in all, just make sure that the people you choose to surround yourself with are people of substance, determination, elevation, and balance. As the old saying goes, "birds of a feather, flock together" so always be aware of who you are "flocking" with. And don't be disheartened when you find yourself having to cut ties with people; believe me, you may discover at the end of it all it's for your own good.
Quick Tips on "Finding" Your Tribe -Be yourself: No sense in pretending to be someone else in efforts to appease potential friends. They'll either accept you for who you are or they won't and in all honesty, you're better off without people who accept a false perception of you. -Be open, but use discernment: If you're wondering why you may be having a difficult time making friends, take a look within. Are you BEING a friend to others, or are you closing yourself off? Try new hobbies, like taking up a dancing or yoga class, or go out on the town during the weekend. While you're navigating the friendship waters, take into account of who you're befriending; ALWAYS pay attention to the warning signs. As always, enjoy the rest of your week and be on the lookout for my #SultrySunday post! Love, BH Let's talk about sex baby, let's talk about you and me, let's talk about all the good things and the bad things that may be... Yes, let's parlay a bit about such a taboo topic--IF it can even be considered taboo anymore in today's overly sexualized society. Though many people have their differing views and beliefs in regards to sex, we can somewhat agree that it is a natural process in which babies and orgasms are derived from in so many words. Warning: if you are someone who's closed-minded and grimaces at the mention of the words "penis" or "vagina", this may not be the post for you. I want my readers to be aware that I am open-minded to most discussions, ESPECIALLY the ones that are relevant in our everyday lives. You may have noticed that the words "casual sex", "abstinence", and "celibacy" are in the title and you may be wondering, "Ok, where is she going with this?" Well, join the ride and follow along carefully. Casual Sex (by definition) is sexual relations not involving a love relationship, especially brief encounters or encounters on one occasion. Sounds familiar? Currently, SOME of the youngins' in our society are summing up this definition with the phrase "Netflix and Chill", an occurrence when two consenting adults watch Netflix and if the mood happens to arrive, "chill" (meaning doing the do). Now, chilling doesn't always have to equal into bonking each other but I just wanted to clear the air that if it were to happen that way, make sure that you are aware of the EXACT kind of relationship/situation you are engaging in with this person. Casual sex is common amongst those who are either not looking to settle down, just got out of a long-term, monogamous relationship, or simply just wanting to "have fun and be free". If none of that applies to you, I recommend you to reconsider before engaging in such acts. If you happen to be someone looking for the Sunday kind of love that Etta James croons about, then I suggest you don't expect that from a Saturday [one] night stand. Trust me, it'll save you nights full of headaches/heart aches. Abstinence, typically defined as self-restraint, self-defiance, or forbearance (from sex in this case) is still being practiced within hook-up culture contrary to belief. And no, there is NOTHING abnormal about choosing to withhold yourself from sex until you are ready. In relation to hook-up culture, abstinence can appear to be obsolete, and may even freak out those who have chosen to participate in sexual activities. Word of advice to those who are ABSTINENT: Don't jeopardize your values and beliefs because someone wants you to give up the goods, male or female. If you believe in sex after marriage, stay true to that philosophy, and kindly say no to those attempting to convince you otherwise. Along the lines of abstinence, celibacy is still being practiced as well, and yes, it IS normal. Most people choose to go celibate after experiencing casual sex that didn't lead anywhere . They may be craving a deeper, spiritual connection that stimulates the mental and emotional before exchanging themselves physically. Whichever path you choose to take on your sexual journey, the most important lesson to take away from this post is to be SAFE. Hookup culture may be "the thing" for now, but STDs such as HIV/AIDS and Herpes last forever. Love,BH In all of my years of unpublished writing, I have come to realize that no one is exempt from experiencing that agonizing phenomenon known as "Writers Block". Whether you believe that it's an excuse for why someone's work has yet to be published or not, just know that the feeling of being unmotivated and possibly even downright apathetic towards a passion can be devastating. Some may even ask, "Well what could be the source of this apathy?", and while some writers may be in denial of their lackadaisical attitude, I on the other hand am a believer of owning my shit (pain, heart-break, disappointment, etc). To put it simply, I am completely disgruntled at the pace of where I am going with my writing "career" and yes, this is going to be a rant. I feel as though I could be wasting my time even putting effort into blogging. I feel as though my shit isn't being read (even though it is). I feel as though I am having a difficult time getting my work noticed, which can be disappointing. I feel as though I have much, much, MUCH more growing to do as a writer...and as a human being. I feel as though I may have to reach people in a different manner, but I don't know which paths to take to do so. I feel as though this rant is pointless, but hey, I'm a writer, and we vent. I feel as if the energy I'm putting into this post could go towards something conducive, like a poem. I feel like this is possibly how the greats--Maya, Langston, Nikki, Zora (just to name a few) may have felt when they were just getting started. I feel that in spite of WHAT I'm feeling, I will be ok, and these feelings of apathy and meaninglessness are temporary. So if you happen to be an aspiring writer like me, or an artist, or just happen to be striving toward a specific goal, don't give up...PLEASE. Someone out there is counting on you, someone out there is rooting for you, someone out there needs someone like you. With love, BH |
Author23 years old. Aspiring Social Media Consultant/Manager. Mass Communications major at Norfolk State University. Lover of God, food, wine. and good times. Archives
December 2018
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